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The Hot Corner: Ichiro Suzuki, Chad Ochocinco, Carly Rae Jepsen - Through The Fence Baseball

The Hot Corner: Ichiro Suzuki, Chad Ochocinco, Carly Rae Jepsen

by Jed Rigney | Posted on Tuesday, July 24th, 2012
| 1052 baseball fanatics read this article

 

The hottest topics for the week of July 22, 2012 …

Ichiro acknowledging Mariners fans during his first at-bat or showing Yankees fans how grey his hair is? (Robert Sorbo/Reuters)

Blockbuster trade: New York made a surprise trade with Seattle – acquiring the Mariners’ 10-time All-Star outfielder Ichiro Suzuki. This is a huge move for the 2007 Yankees.

A body at rest: Red Sox slugger and jovial big guy David Ortiz was put on the disabled list with a strained Achilles tendon – which is odd, because that would imply he actually moved his body.

Milestone: The Tigers’ heavyset Miguel Cabrera just recently hit the 300th home run of his career. He says his favorite part of hitting a home run is coming across home plate – or any plate for that matter.

End of days: Nationals pitcher Stephen Strasberg is approaching his 160-inning limit for the year, which means his season will end in September – just like the Mayans predicted.

Guess who: Roberto Hernandez, who used the false name Fausto Carmona, has finally gotten all of his legal affairs in order and received a visa to return to the United States – under the name Napoleon Dynamite.

Hitting the town: The Yankees’ Robinson Cano had a 23-game hitting streak recently come to an end. There was talk he might threaten Joe DiMaggio’s legendary 56-game streak by some people – who are very bad at math.

Going postal: Cleveland Indians Hall of Famer Larry Doby got a U.S. stamp in his honor. I don’t think it’s going to do that well – mainly because no one really knows who he is and when you lick the stamp, it tastes like Cleveland.

Extra Innings

Over the top: The NCAA inflicted heavy sanctions against Penn State University, but they said they would not give the football program the “death penalty.” … However, Joe Paterno wasn’t so lucky.

What’s in a name? Dolphins wide receiver Chad Ochocinco legally changed his name back to the original: Chad Johnson – probably in preparation for his new career in adult films.

Sensitive male: New York Knicks owner James Dolan said they didn’t re-sign Jeremy Lin because he felt “deceived and betrayed.” Well, now he knows how the fans feel.

In theaters now: If I could sum up The Dark Knight Rises in one word, it would be “movie.”

Idle chat: Mariah Carey is joining the judging panel for “American Idol.” It’s a good thing there are two seats available.

Maybe not: At the Teen Choice Awards, Carly Rae Jepsen won Choice Summer Song for her smash hit “Call Me Maybe” – narrowly beating out “The Blood of Power” by the band Dying Fetus.

Contributors: Eliza Bayne, Zach Pennington, Stephen Arenholtz, Glen Hentz

Post By Jed Rigney (202 Posts)

Jed Rigney covers general baseball randomness for Through The Fence Baseball. His work has been described as "prolific" (which isn't really a compliment). Despite a series of destructive relationships with uncaring women, he has persevered. He is an Aries and therefore quite courageous. He has never been arrested (though he was once "detained" briefly). And he hopes to one day see Gary Busey actually turn a tornado into a rainbow -- if only just once.

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