Ned Colletti and the Dodgers: Headed for Splitsville?

Ned Colletti (and his toupee) in happier times with Dodgers owner Frank McCourt.

Sometimes in sports and in life, it’s just time for a change with certain relationships.

There may not be any fighting. There may even be some winning and good times in these relationships.
But sometimes, it’s just time to call it quits and move in a different direction.

Who didn’t think Brad Pitt, the world’s most beautiful man (I’m just sayin’…), and Jennifer Aniston (pretty close to perfect!) were meant to be together? I mean, come on … if they would have procreated, those would have been some beautiful babies!

How about another pretty perfect couple – Bennifer? Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez seemed destined for greatness, only to end up in Splitsville.

It’s time to add another pairing to the likes of the above-mentioned fractured relationships – Ned Colletti and the Los Angeles Dodgers.

The time has come for follicly challenged men all over Los Angeles to lower their toupees to half-brow in honor of Colletti and usher him out of town. And, to make this an amicable split along the lines of Angelina Jolie and Billy Bob Thornton, we can help Colletti reserve a one-way ticket to his hometown – Chicago.

Colletti was born in the Windy City. He attended college at Northern Illinois University. Colletti to the Chicago Cubs to replace the recently fired Jim Hendry is a match made in heaven, a win-win!

The Cubs get a hometown guy as their general manager who can talk about how much the team meant to him as a boy growing up in Chicago. It will be a Cubs love-fest. Maybe Colletti can make it even more ivy-like by firing manager Mike Quade and hiring Mr. Cubbie, Ryne Sandberg as the team’s skipper?

Colletti has done some good things in Los Angeles. In his six years in L.A., Colletti has led the Dodgers to three playoff appearances. The problem is, though, that Colletti’s best work came early on in his Dodgers tenure; now the team is headed in the wrong direction.

Once Colletti is Chicago bound, where should the Dodgers look for a replacement? They don’t even have to leave Chavez Ravine!

The Dodgers need to hire one of their current Assistant General Managers as the team’s next GM – De Jon Watson or Logan White. Both men are desirable GM candidates, as evidenced by the fact that other teams are interested in them.
In 2010, Watson and White interviewed for the GM post with the Arizona Diamondbacks. White also interviewed for the GM position with the New York Mets last year.

Chances are in the very near future that Watson and White will be running other MLB teams if the Dodgers don’t make this move.

As the scouting director for the Cincinnati Reds from 1998-2000, Watson was responsible for selecting 25 players who have gone on to play in the major leagues. As the scouting director for the Dodgers, White helped the team garner the best draft class in MLB in 2003 and the second-best in 2004 (according to Baseball America).

Perhaps Colletti and the Cubs will end up like Jolie and Pitt, who rose above their breakups and seem to be happy together. If so, more power to them. The Dodgers just need to make a fresh start with an owner who’s not a whack-job like Frank McCourt and with a GM who isn’t resting on his Andre Ethier trade laurels.

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